Family Life (You can choose your friends…)
If you’re thinking this topic doesn’t apply to you, you’re wrong. It applies to every single person on the planet. You are either part of a family or need to be! We were designed to be in families and I believe we can only reach our full potential when growing together with others.
If you’re a person of faith you might say family life should be more like in the Bible. Really?
- Take the first family – Cain murders his brother. Dysfunctional or what?
- Still in the early chapters, Abram has to separate from his nephew because their staff are quarrelling. Happy families? I don’t think so!
- What about when Abraham has an illegitimate son with his maidservant, at the suggestion of his wife, resulting in conflict between the two women?
- Then there’s Jacob and Esau – twins fighting since in the womb.
- Or Joseph and his oh so loving brothers – Joseph thrown in a pit and then sold as a slave!
- King Saul tried to kill his son’s best friend,
- Solomon had 700 wives,
- And in the New Testament Paul has to tell Ephesian children to obey their parents and fathers to stop winding their children up!
Family tensions are not a new thing and not exclusive to your family
And what’s more they continue after you’ve grown up!
A journal article in Psychology and Aging notes that:
“Tensions are normative in the parent and adult child relationship.”
That’s parents and their grown-up children! So it never stops?! I was hoping for a quiet life once my little darlings had grown up! And I guess I’ll never stop finding my dad annoying (sorry dad)!
The article continues:
“The parent-child relationship is one of the most long-lasting and emotionally intense social ties. Although often positive and supportive, this tie also includes feelings of irritation, tension, and ambivalence.”
Well if you were feeling bad about not having a nice normal family, you can relax because there’s probably no such thing.
So once we’ve accepted that, what can we do about it? Find out in the next 2 blogs!